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Hi, my name is Farm

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erase the race. [poem]

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5 with 4 vote(s)

By Farm

Created: 2009-07-15 19:34:51

All stories by Farm

On your marks.

Can't back down,

Show no weakness,

Show no frowns.

--

Get set.

Ready to win,

No more silence,

No more grins.

--

Go.

Run for miles,

Escape the past,

Escape the smiles.

_____

A/C: I haven't been writing anything good lately, I'm in a rut.

No one in this section gives feedback, and if I do get comments, it's just "This is good."

How am I supposed to improve if that's all I get?

And apparently I need content, stfu TDP.

Member Comments

Farm

103/Female
Canada
All My Stories

Posted On: July 16, 2009
I knew this poem was only going to be short, because I based it on "On your marks, get set, go."

I didn't force any of it.

I don't think I'm good at non rhyming poems, but I'll try pretty soon.

Cosmic_

17/Female
Las Vegas, NV
All My Stories

Posted On: July 16, 2009
I think poems flow more when they rhyme. ._.

pinkshine05

19/Female
Canada
All My Stories

Posted On: July 16, 2009
*rhyme

pinkshine05

19/Female
Canada
All My Stories

Posted On: July 16, 2009
Hmm. To be honest, I thought it was great but I've realized that almost all your poems ryhme. However I think this kind of poem would sound better if you just wrote off from your heart and just let the words flow. Frankly, it does flow already, but it might sink in even better if you just wrote it without any ryhmes. And when you write with your heart the poem gets longer sometimes but yeah.

Overall, it was nice. I liked it.

xoxo Crazy

ghost_girl1

19/Female
Tahlequah, OK
All My Stories

Posted On: July 15, 2009
this was good.it really was.my sister says your poems are always like this.oh and dont take that in a bad way I mean theyre always good.

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