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Hi, my name is Rose.
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 | Life [Short Story] |
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 4.6 with 10 vote(s)
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| Created: 2009-12-24 12:47:21 |
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[[A/N: It’s techinally not in the right section, but there’s just so much packed in my heart right now I need to let go of some of it before it just explodes. I can’t think without another subject tearing at the corners and folds of my heart, waiting for it to break. I can’t smile without the wanting to cry. I need to let go of everything, so, my feelings will run deeply, like the blood pounding through my veins. Just listen, please, and understand when words get tough.]]
It’s like there’s an excuse not to speak anymore—Nobody’s listening. Screaming as loud as you can, nobody understands the quaking void that lingers in your heart. So many emotions pour through you that it’s hard to think with bursting into a fit of patheic sobs. Your friends try to calm you—They notice the difference. The sudden drop in your voice, your sudden lack of replies, your sudden depression of speaking. It’s as if they can see right through your skin, past your ribs, and to the breaking object that beats life through your body. It’s like they can see, but they can’t feel.
The Earth’s core doesn’t understand you anymore. They reject you. They don’t want you, because tears still linger in your eyes, filling past the green and swelling up so hard that blinking causes a sob. They clip your wings, and you fall from the sky, hitting Reality so hard it hurts. Giving you excuse to cry. A reason to sniffle a sob, try to hold your head high, and break down when everyone’s away.
Anyone can hold a blank smile on their face. True talents can see through those. True talents can see through your eyes, and see through your pain. They can’t rip through your chest and tear out your heart, replacing it with their own though. They don’t understand. They can’t understand.
Tears fall on the diary page, leaking through the pages, like emptiness seeping through your cold veins. Reading your own words hurt ten times worse than your own pain. Speaking them only causes a break down. There’s nobody there.
How can one person cause this much pain? By deceiving your thoughts with loving stares, and constant passing past your homeroom, standing as possibly close to you as fate could allow.
Because of you. Because you hurt them, they experienced your pain, and hid from the world, right when you figured, you learned, you needed them. Right at that second, they left, never wanting to give up, but still with a constant nagging that someone was going to get hurt.
In the end, it leaves you with tears. Nothing but tears, moppy love songs, and red, blocty eyes. The constant wanting for something to hold on to, someone to understand you fully and completely. That someone that never seems to come.
It takes two to understand fully. It takes two to make a whole. Each side plays a hard game of love reality, but neither speaks up, neither’s hint enough. It caused him a heart break, a slow hurting break. It caused you a break down, where life doesn’t mean anything. Heavan’s a hell. Hell’s a Heavan.
If either of you had understood the hints, the signs. The boy wouldn’t be breaking hearts, the girl wouldn’t be fading. At least one hint of happiness could cure either’s day. Like a laugh, or...a joke. Happiness doesn’t nessicary mean everything’s perfect. It just means you’ve taken the time to look past life’s imperfections. To realize, there’s someone out there, someone you’ll never think of.
You still can’t find the right to breathe. He stepped into your life when everything was crumbling, and now he’s left you to fall when everything’s got worse. At least, you think he’s left a failing world in your hands. You never realize he’s always going to be there.
It’s funny how you hurt the one’s you love, and the one’s that love you, hurt you in the long run. Life’s just a bxtch like that. Never escaping it’s twirling fingers. That’s how bad reality hurts.
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[SECOND PASSAGE]
Hate, is a very strong wrong, that some use on occassions, just to hurt people who they shouldn’t be hurting. Love, is just a word that people use to much, before actually overlooking the correct definition. Both are always used in the wrong time, the wrong place, and neither ever stays that way. You may hold a grudge—But hate—It is a strong wrong. Stronger than you think. You may like someone, with half your heart—But love—It’s more a word you know. It takes a long time, more than four months, more than a week, more than a couple of stares. It takes years, a full heart, and a willing to do anything for all for the one you supposivally love.
Finding someone who really hates you, is like finding an invisablly pin in a hay stack. Nearly impossible. Finding someone that truly loves you, that notices your every flaw, difference, and mistake, yet still loves everything about you, that’s nearly twice as hard. People don’t just love people for people anymore. They love people for looks, money, and on. Finding someone who will love you for yourself and nothing else, is something everyone deserves to have a shot at. But we never do.
Sometimes we need to put these small things behind us, to avoid heart breaks, to avoid a slowly growing dislike for someone or something. Sometimes we need to just say, here’s to the future because I’m done with the past. Some of us never do, comparing a value deeper inside of us against those wonder working powers. They’re right, that is a significant and important part of us all, more important than anything. We need never to forget those. But we do.
Misery makes people forget about those values, though. Misery is what makes us keep our sanity, because doing something risky anymore just isn’t worth the time. It’s like you feel like dying, and that’s just what you’re going to sit around waiting on until the time comes, without taking anymore chances. It doesn’t matter anymore.
Everyone wants to be happy, although. Most people consider happy people to be lucky. Some take out there anger or misery in a strange, painfully, sarcastic way that only tries to hurt and make everyone around them feel their pain. Some want both. But you can’t have a rainbow, if life never rains.
Basically, life has to be rained on, and your parade has to be ruined at some point in your life. Keeping yourself awake, keeping your soul alive is the key to the sun. Keep the sun out, when mixed with the pouring rain, and you’ll have your rainbow. The thing you deserve for standing through the pain. |
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