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All created stories have to follow . We do not allow any sexually related material. The Doll Palace will be enforcing this rule and completely blocking access to the accounts that disregard our policy and create sexually oriented stories.
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Hi, my name is Ox Heart
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 5 with 4 vote(s)
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| Created: 2009-04-08 08:13:12 |
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Some days later, I was more than for certain they were killing me.
I sat and I stared at the floor. It was those same grey floorboards that were there when I came, though they were different now. They were soiled and tarnished. I ran my dirty hand along the rough, bare wood submissively. This was all I would know. There was no point in trying the door; that would never work. And then the pain came again, ripping through my empty gut with an uncontrollably ravenous hunger. Someday soon, if someone walked through the door I would eat them alive.
Instinctively, I pushed away the thought. I was already close enough to lunacy as occurrences had had it.
Slowly, and gradually, a raised myself onto my knees, as if I had not been careful then I could have nearly toppled in an instant. My legs were so weak, and… what was the word? Bendy, like Cheryl Cram they had been. I regained my balance, little by little, as I circled round the perimeter of the grounds, which were small, like a cage. I had done this everyday since I had realised they’d meant to kill me. I kept my mind to minimum, just not to let the demons in. I knew my thoughts were full of demons. I just listened to the sound of the chain as it dragged and it scraped on the base of the box I was trapped in, the weight of it compressing my throat in a sense that I found satisfactory. When I got to the window, I pressed my palm onto the bricks, just too think, that once there been, was placed a big hole. There had only been the distance of the wall to bar me from the sun and wind and rain and glories of the world outside. They were not glories as in pleasures; well at least, not anymore. They were the glories of the stations of attack. Anything, anything I would have done, to rid the world this horrid thing, to have no more. But it wasn’t that simple; nothing in life is that simple. It had not been a matter of distance. It was a matter of the strength of the material. If it had been fabric then I could have ripped it. Maybe it was made of gold. I would have had more chance just then.
I turned my back to it. This was no riches. It was a miracle I had even remembered gold. From anyone else’s perspective you would not have thought that the subject of gold would still have come into my radar.
As I leant there the pain came again. I narrowed my eyes, closing them tight and I groaned. It had to stop… it had to stop, some time it must; it had to stop. I wouldn’t scream; I’d hate myself for it. There was no harsher reminder for the loss of my tongue than the sound of my scream, and no room for crying. I wound my wiry arms around my stomach, only thickset for the thick of my bones that had always been large. Actually, it had been a good job I had been overweight when I came here. I had survived off my own misfortune. Somebody underweight would not have lived for long in here; it had been a certainty. I was growing closer, and closer and closer to my death bed as every single day had passed by. And every single day was painful, just more painful than the last. Every single day had been much worse off than the previous.
It was on that thought I heard a click. My eyes darted up, and for a second I had forgotten the pain. Somebody was coming in… but who…? No… no… I’d rather that they left me alone… just… unless it had been feeding or some water or a change but…
No, it wasn’t that.
I blinked twice at the figure in the doorway. It was blurred and foggy, and I could not believe…
It was Angela Miles. She was stood, pretty straight in a knee length black skirt and a jumper. It appeared, even still that she was heavily pregnant. That had been an indicator of time. It can’t have been that long, unless… this was her second child. But it can’t have been that long, can it? I gave up… I gave up. I couldn’t fathom it, and either way it didn’t matter.
Before I had known she was taking steps closer and the door had closed behind her. Somebody had sent her; I was sure of it. But why…? Her eyes had grown gaunt and red and heavy underneath. It was then that it occurred to me most females here had been expectant. I guessed… you wouldn’t have a chance. They’re used for sxx, and they don’t care. Well at least I could have said I had been fortunate in that department. If I was female, then most surely I would have been impregnated by now. They were animalistic; they didn’t think. I couldn’t blame them, because I had been the same, and up till now there was no chance to disprove this to them sincerely. Honestly, and truthfully, it had not been so at this moment, but then who could have expected it. I was sick and I was haggard. I had not had sxx with a person since this woman in here now, inside the house of Alexander, other than with boiled dogs in hazy trauma.
I shook the thought away again. No, no that, no, I wouldn’t think of that.
I kept my back against the wall and waited for her then to speak, but she didn’t. She just stared at me for a very long time. Her eyes had looked soft now, in defiance of the grey and bags that circled them. As our eyes had met I felt ashamed. I was the fool now. I watched her pink lips parting, and then I thought of when I’d kissed her mouth. I was hefty then; I had a tongue. It had been so frustrating… but then so justified.
Then suddenly, she turned her head away from me and then she spoke. I saw the tendons in her neck begin to stretch, her big brown eyes now focused on the wood. I felt an element of missing.
“I heard about what happened to you.” Her voice was soft and quiet. She had waited for a second, but then had come not a reply. I couldn’t say just what she meant that would concern her. So many things had happened to me since then, since we had met for the last time. It was then that I realised that the pain was no longer coming, or it was, but there was no sensation. It had been the body’s way, just not to work in times of mental stimulation. I could have fretted, let my body leak with sweat, but it had been so hard I felt I had no liquid left to sweat. My mouth was dry as bone, but then no tongue to feel dry. So she started again, half turned away.
“They took your tongue out didn’t they? I saw the people slaying animals.”
It then also occurred to me that this was the first time I had ever really heard her speak. And it was somewhat open… open… like she was trying to open herself out to me. I directed myself onto her talking, and then I blotted out all other thoughts. This was too intriguing to miss, and so much more riveting when I had seen nothing for as long as I could think.
“I know you probably hate me now,” She said. “I just want you to know that I don’t mean for it to end this way. I never wanted this to happen; I know that I’m not worth all this hassle, but… I can’t really speak for you.”
She took in a deep, quivering breath, and then she placed her hand over her eyes. I could not describe how I felt, but my whole insides just seemed to restlessly turn over. I could hate her… I’d never hate her. There was only me to hate… but I could say nothing. I had to think that she was brave; I could have hated her, that having been if I was thoughtless, I was cruel, I learnt nothing. But that had not been the case. I could have slashed at her and injured her, and then they’d know where she had been. At her words I had decided… perhaps she had not just been sent. But then what if it was an act? It looked too real… too real to be of an act, I could almost have said I was sure.
After some moments silence she had picked up again, and when she rose up her head I could see that her eyes had turned misty. I could not imagine what this felt like for her. I supposed that if she had been sent, then there probably would be someone just to monitor what she said and what she did in here. She could be telling, or for that matter giving, me anything.
“I saw a report in the paper that had said that you were missing. There were quotes from your Mother in it, and it seems that she is devastated. I’m confused about you…” She sniffled, brushing her eyes with her sleeve. “You had a Mother at home and… and it said it was unlikely that you had gone off with any friends, but someone cares about you and yet…” She stifled a cry, and it was clear that she would not complete her sentence. I only had my intentions of keeping my distance. I would never go near her again. It was astounding, that the woman I had raped had been just talking to me willingly. When I looked at her I felt warmth for her, but then I could have mistaken that dull look in her eyes. I could not have told what she meant. And the thought of my Mother… the report… she had gone looking for me; she wanted help. She still wanted to find me. If only she had known what I’d done; then perhaps she would have left me. I was worth nothing, zilch, nothing. I had to forget her, although it had been so, so, hard. She was my Mother… she was my Mother. It had been so hard to forget, but then this was life changing. Forget. Forget, please forget… She wouldn’t find me anyway.
Angela placed her hand on her stomach, and on top of the life that was living in there. What could have become of that thing? She kept her hand on it, and then she continued to speak; this time her eyes were boring into mine, coated in wetness I could see she would not let spill.
“You are fertile, aren’t you?” She asked me, as if to clarify something. I had been so shocked that I almost shook my head. She could not have been suggesting that… no… she couldn’t be saying that. Bewildered, I nodded slightly.
“If you are, then I am pretty sure this is yours.” She cast her look downwards. “Aaron thinks it’s his.”
Shxt. That man hated me enough. Had it not ever arisen to him that there had been the possibility that it could have been mine? Before I could think any longer she had started again.
“I do love Aaron… or I did. But what I do know is that you killed Cheryl Cram. Cram was Sydney’s daughter. You do know Sydney; I know you do. She was his second daughter to Felecia Cram. Felecia is somewhere else, outside of all this horrible mess, but she bore several children to him, Cheryl being her final one. She handed her to him when she left him. It was clear that he didn’t want her, so he kept her here as a prisoner and a slave.
“I live mainly in these parts. This is the back of the house, where the prisoners are kept. At the front it would appear this was a normal house, but it is big; I’m telling you. It is big. The front is where the seniors live. I am senior, but I prefer to stay back here. I just want to know what’s going on.
“I am allowed outside sometimes. I have a house out of town. We are in the town that you live, if you’ve been wondering, unless you’ve seen this place before. Sometimes I think that maybe I could report this place and get the law involved, but the thing is… I fear for the people. And I did love Aaron, I think. He believes in this, does Aaron. You know how lawless this place is in general, and he thinks that it gives him power.
“I can see that it doesn’t. And I always wanted to see Cheryl dead, or out of here, but I had known that it wasn’t possible. The front way is quite heavily guarded, and of course, it is rules that Cheryl and her kind do not venture from grounds or see outside. That prevents them from knowing where we are, so that even if they got hold of something like a phone they wouldn’t be able to tell someone exactly where they were. It’s all thought out, completely.
“They say involving law will cause a death. They try to make you guilty. They also have various locations and other guards that live outside of here. This is what they would call the head quarters. If you offend people here, and escape, they will promise if you’re ever seen by a person of theirs you will be killed straight away. If you escape they will hope that you live your life in fear, like Felecia Cram. If anybody saw her she would die. People get roped into this too, like me, and like her. I met Aaron in his town, and it was then we started courting. I didn’t realise who he was, and then he used me for this. He withheld us starting a family.
“That’s why I don’t love Aaron anymore. Maybe I never did love Aaron. Maybe I pitied him. I just wish… I would rather I was gone from here. I don’t know anymore…”
She pressed harder on the bulge that was her womb.
“I know that if he found out this was yours he’d want to kill it… or he would do what Gerald Sydney did and he would keep it here. Sometimes I wish that before anything bad did happen to it, it would just die. Sometimes I wish that I would die. I even wish that you would die.”
There was a long, silent moment as I looked into her eyes. She was right, but… oh so wrong. So it had not only been I who had had those feelings before. This was a Hxll hole, even more of a fxcking Hxll hole than I had thought of it before, if it had even been at all achievable. There was something from her words that had made me want to fight; there was the fear and the weakness and the giving up… but she was lovely. She did not deserve this. She needed to get out; she needed to… but how? Oh she could leave, but she was strapped here by her conscience. Face it, people had to die to stop this mess, maybe they did… but it would prevent so much more suffering, future suffering if we could all lay down our lives and cut this up. Angela… this had been so unlikely… like she’d said, in the same way she had not known who Aaron was I had not known who she was.
I longed to ask her questions. Would she know that Steven Gates? Did she know what had happened when he deposited her after she was used by me and Alexander? But no, I couldn’t. I could spit out not a word, only a sound.
She had an incredible story. I could see her as a light, just like the light form outside. All that time I had put off my empathy and I had thrown her aside. I don’t empathise with her! I don’t! I don’t! But I had, all along. She was, as Alexander had just put it, such a rarity in this town. She was different; she was singled out. And she was different to me, even here, for not only was she black, but she was stronger than the rest of them. Whether it was something that had been instilled inside of her over the last short period I could not have known, but all I knew was she was different. Even that Gillian Gray had been nothing like this girl. I could tell why that Gray had been here. She was rough and nasty and she bowed down to these people with no fight. I could see that now Miles was prepared. She was thinking of death, for like me she had had enough of this Hxll. And thinking of death had only meant one thing; it had meant that she was a captive hero, someone who would die now so willingly for the end of this nightmare, like myself, but no… I’d never let her.
I just wished that there had been some way, some way I could have got her out of here, with the child, far, far away somewhere… somewhere that she would never, ever be found again with these people and that she could live happily and in peace. But that was just a dream. I would be in pain for the rest of my life in the process if it could only have happened. It was what I had wanted for Cheryl, but now Cheryl was dead, and I was glad, that both Miles and I had both been just glad. She could stay well away from this now…
There was just one thing that had made me strangely jealous and angry, and that had been the fact that she had cherished Aaron. She should not have cherished Aaron. Aaron was a fiend… a fiend he was for supporting this thing. There was nothing could describe my hate, and now it was beginning to show that his hate was returned. I had also now wondered what had happened to him. She said she had pitied him. She probably had met him when he had been burnt.
But now she was stepping towards me, and now I towards her. She reached out and took hold of my hand, and she stared into me, her eyes still a glisten from the tear drops like morning dew in grass, in sun. She bit her fat, trembling lip, shaking her head from the side to the side.
“I’m sorry, I am. I know that you stood up to them. I heard what you had said. You said that Cheryl deserved to be somewhere else, and you were right. I know we’ll sort this out somehow, I know we will, otherwise… my whole life will be a pointless mess.”
She pulled me closer and I gripped onto her fingers. Once again I was faced by the dazzling pattern of the brown in her eyes, and the lines all different shades merged in together with the kindness and the gallant streak I knew would get me through this time. I had missed her; I had, all the time.
And I did her man no favours once again when our lips had fallen and touched.
From an outside viewer it was an ugly kiss, in an ugly, dim lit room, performed by hideously ugly people, but no… it would not be for me, never. It was from that point on that I realised that the feeling I had had for her was love, and then how she could return it was a subject that I would not begin to puzzle on. She was too complex; she was so complex in the mind. She was thoughtful; she was sweet. Before… before she’d only been my floppy play thing, flimsy on the floor as I and James had stood before her in her murkiness. But now… now this was so different; it was different just like her. It was so unthinkable, something I would never have dreamt up in the wildest of my tortured dreams.
We came closer and closer, so knit tight into one that we became inseparable, and I had known I was made for her, and I wanted… I had wanted this to never end. If this could have been the rest of my life I could have died a happy man, and to think that she’d forgiven me had been more than I could have ever asked. |
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