Witty responses! xD
 

This thread is for hilarious responses to things that you either came up with, said, or found somewhere.

Person one: I'm not a happy camper >:[
Person two: Get a new tent >:]

Teacher: Forget your experiment book again, and I'll line you up to a wall, and you know what happens then.
Pupil: Yeah, then I sidestep, and your awful marksmen ruin a perfect paint job.

LOL! I've been looking so me up.
'That's the most I've ever heard you speak in a day'.
"Sorry. The sloppy stew I had at lunch reminded me of your face and I didn't feel like speaking much."

OR
'That's the most I've ever heard you speak in a day'
'I wish I could say the same for you.'

That's all for now.

Me: ... and that's how the song goes, Jared!
Jerad: Nuh-uh! It's frying pan first, then the garbage can!
Brandon: :|
Me: Would you just let me fini-
Jerad: PARTICLE MAN, PARTICLE MAN, DOIN' THE THINGS A PARTICLE CAAAAN!!!

I promptly started laughing and couldn't breathe at that point. :lol:

"I'm sorry, I can't hear you over the sound of how awesome I am."

XD

Very witty, that.

(asking everyone in general about forces acting in pairs)
Science teacher: Okay, if I fired a shotgun, why would it hurt my shoulder?
Me: Because you're holding it wrong?

:lol:

Friend: When God was giving out noses you heard roses & asked for a big red one.
Me: *PUNCH*

Does that count? XD

"Sorry, but you're mistaking me for someone who actually cares."

I use that a lot. XD

Also, this was at a party, when this nasty preppy skinny girl came up to me (I'm not fat, but compared to her, anyone would be to her mind);

Horrible girl: You're so fat!
Me: Maybe, but I can lose weight. But you can never lose the ugly.

XD Burn.

"Wow? Cool? Am I supposed to care?"

I use that lot when IMing; I usually don't care about things. XD I have a very short attention span.

XD this is from WoW. I love my guild :'D

Guildie: How old are you? *To new recruit*
New recruit: Old enough for bacon.

:lol:

Troll on Youtube: Where were we?
Me: Not sure. Youtube's pretty stupid when it comes to comments that've been replied to.
Troll: THEY SEE ME ROLLIN'
THEY HATIN'

I lol'd. Majorly. XD