|
||||
|
||||
|
||||
06-14-2011, 05:21 AM
You have invigorated my need for comedic quotes...
So combined with my obsessive geeky streak I (and Wikipedia) have conjured up a few Astonishing X-Men ones... Magneto: (To Team) I'm not even going to try to sugarcoat this, my friends. Anyone willing to take part in this raid isn't likely to make it back alive. Nightcrawler: Ja, so? About Logan's current whereabouts Shadowcat: "Elsewhere"? What does that mean? Beast: It means we've narrowed it down to "else" Emma Frost (to the students): They will always hate us. We will never live in a world of peace. Which is why control and non-violence are essential. We must prove ourselves a peaceful people. We must give the ordinary humans respect, compliance, and understanding. And we must never mistake that for trust. Emma Frost: Jean Grey is a sacred cow. At least we agree on half of that. Dr. Rao: Is Doctor McCoy alright? He -- Emma Frost: He has a disease, if you recall. An inexplicably adverse reaction to being shot at. The Thing: Didn't they come up with a cure for your kind? Wolverine: You got a problem with mutants? The Thing: I meant Canadians. Cyclops: I want this thing off my lawn. (unleashes a full-force optic blast on the Sentinel attacking the school) Shadowcat: Who's the kid? Emma Frost: Negasonic Teenage Warhead Shadowcat: Okay. We've run out of names. Emma Frost: You feel no pain. You will go straight to a hospital. Remember nothing of this place. And every time you hear the words "parsley", "intractable", and "longitude", you will vomit uncontrallably for 48 hours. Cyclops: Nice work, X-Men. (Quietly) My girlfriend is very weird. Even if you don't like her, you have to love Emma's 'scintillating' wit XD      
|
|
|
||||
|
||||
|
06-16-2011, 03:52 AM
All quotes from "My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic".
 Twilight Sparkle: All the ponies in this town are CRAZY! Rainbow Dash: The shape's fine. Just make the whole thing, you know, cooler. (pause) It needs to be about 20% cooler. Rarity: Leave me alone! I want to be alone! I want to wallow in ... whatever it is that ponies are supposed to wallow in! Do ponies wallow in pity? Oh, listen to me, I don't even know what I'm supposed to wallow in! I'm so PATHETIC! Pinkie Pie: Are you loco in the coco?! Rainbow Dash: YES! That means the ticket is mine! Hahaha, ♪I got the ti-cket, I got the ti-cket!♪ (Applejack and Fluttershy glare; Twilight and Spike stare in disbelief) Y'know, I haven't perfected my signature moves for the Wonderbolts, anyway. I don't need that ticket either. Fluttershy: Um, Pinkie Pie... about this party for Gilda; do you really think it's a good idea? I mean... Pinkie Pie: Don't you worry your pretty little head about mean old Gilda! Your Aunty Pinkie Pie's got it all taken care of! Fluttershy: (annoyed) I'm a year older than you. Rainbow Dash: We tried persuasion, charm, whatever it is Pinkie Pie does... Spike: Could it be... ZOMBIES?! Twilight Sparkle: Um, not likely. Spike: Ugh... come on, you guys! Let me in! Rainbow Dash: Sure thing, Spike! Rarity: (blocks door) Heavens, no! We're getting dressed! Applejack: "Dressed"? Um, beg your pardon, Rarity, but we don't normally wear clothes. 
|
|
|
||||
|
||||
|
07-06-2011, 03:57 PM
Esdeonfi:
wut My dad just asked me if I was playing a John Cage piece 3:55pmNightmare Loreliux: ljsdkhjf 3:55pmEsdeonfi: John Cage is a composer that's known for having this piece called 4:33" 3:55pmNightmare Loreliux: o_O 3:55pmEsdeonfi: that's 4 minutes and 33 seconds of whatever the background noises happen to be 3:55pmNightmare Loreliux: LOLOLOLOLOL 3:55pmEsdeonfi: while the pianist sits at the piano and doesn't play a note 3:55pmNightmare Loreliux: I LIKE THAT SONG 3:55pmEsdeonfi: ikr
|
|
|
||||
|
||||
|
07-07-2011, 03:44 PM
All from "LOTR: Return Of The King."
Witch King: [taking Eowyn by the throat] You fool. No man can kill me. Die now. [Merry stabs the Witch King from behind; the Witch King shrieks and falls to his knees. Eowyn rises and pulls off her helm, her hair falls down over her shoulder] Eowyn: I am no man. [she thrusts her sword into the Witch King's helm and twists; he shrieks and implodes] Sam: What are you up to? Sneaking off, are we? Gollum: Sneaking? Sneaking? Fat Hobbit is always so polite. Smeagol shows them secret ways that nobody else could find, and they say "sneak!" Sneak? Very nice friend. Oh, yes, my precious. Very nice, very nice. Sam: All right, all right! You just startled me is all. What were you doing? Gollum: Sneaking. Pippin: How far is Minas Tirith? Gandalf: Three days' ride, as the Nazgul flies, and you'd better hope we don't have one of those on our tail. Merry: Why did you look? Why do you always have to look? Pippin: I don't know. I can't help it. Merry: You never can. Faramir: Mithrandir! They broke through our defenses! They've taken the bridge and the west bank. Battalions of Orcs are crossing the river. Irolas: It is as the Lord Denethor predicted. Long has he forseen this doom. Gandalf: Forseen and done nothing!
|
|
|
||||
|
||||
|
07-09-2011, 08:46 AM
"The word 'studying' was made up of two words originally - 'students dying'."
"Next time someone says "sticks and stones will break my bones but words will never hurt me" I'm gonna throw the dictionary at them." -Random quotes “I mean a weapon you hold. You have a gun, Tanith has a sword... I want a stick.” ~ Valkyrie Cain
“I’ll buy you a stick for Christmas.” - Skulduggery Pleasant
|
|
|
|||
|
|||
|
07-22-2011, 08:29 PM
My brother- "Hey, why is it so great to be on the first row in band?"
Me- "Because, my dear percussionist brother, when the day of the auction comes, you will get the best pictures of the directors with pie all over them. And because it shows you're awesome."
|
|
|
||||
|
||||
|
07-22-2011, 09:36 PM
Quote:
|
|
|
|||
|
|||
|
07-23-2011, 03:36 AM
"There's no 'I' in team."
"Yeah, but there's no 'u', either. So if I'm not on the team, and you're not on the team, nobody's on the d*mn team! The team sucks!" Not sure about this quote, I think it's from Red vs Blue originally, I just saw it in someone's signature on another forum. 
|
|
|
||||
|
||||
|
07-25-2011, 06:47 AM
When customers say "I don't want none of that", I'm going to start putting it on their subs anyways. PROPER GRAMMAR IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN "I helped my friend, Jack, off a horse" and "I helped my friend jack off a horse."
A friend of mine and my sister's posted this on Facebook after working at Subway... Oh, God, it's hilarious! 
|
07-22-2011, 11:49 PM
Linear Mode
