"The Rapture"

[AaronShadows]

It has failed to arrive.

Again.

This is not fair.

I had plans.

Firstly, I was going to kill a legion of zombies in the rapture. Secondly, when the Four Riders turned up to kill me for being a nuisance, I was going to do epic battle with them using two pistols, lose epically after leading them a merry, high-octane-gunfighting-with-plenty-of-large-subnuclear-explosions dance, go to Hell, pick the lock, escape, kill Ba'al by dropping a demonic chandelier on him in the process, then lead a rebellion in Hell, win, execute Satan, become the Devil, and start a war with Heaven. Winning this war, I kill God, take his place, rule the world for ten days to give the rest of the Universe a grace period, and get used to being god, and all that nonsense, then lead a hellish crusade throughout the stars and rule all of existence itself.

...I'm nothing if not ambitious.

And now, thanks to Jesus' forgetfulness, I might not even get to do it this lifetime. Certainly not while I'm still of an age the average mortal reaches. I'm suing.

Seriously speaking, there goes another crack apocalypse prediction. 2012 is probably going to be the same, obviously. Unless it's just going to be a partial or complete breakdown of world order/the beginning of a worldwide conflict short of a nuclear war/some other mess that generally changes society completely, thus ending the world -as we know it.- Which is not quite as far-fetched as the planet exploding, but still not too likely.

[naruto_fan]

Aaron, you surprise me with mind of yours... o.o

But really, I knew it wasnt going to happen. If the world is gonna end it'll just... end. But I have a feeling it wont end for a very long time.

[spirit_queen]

Lol, it specifically says in the Bible that NO ONE will know when the Rapture is coming. It says something about it coming "like a thief in the night"; in other words, we won't know what hit us.

And now we have loons saying, "It's this Saturday!", or, "OMG, the Mayans never finished their calendar, which means the world will end 2012!"

To the first, read the frickin' Bible! It says you won't know! PERIOD!

To the second... well, the Mayan civilization ended. They didn't add more to their dumb calendar or whatever because they weren't around to finish it.

People are so dumb. Seriously, I'm surprised humanity has made it this far; whether your Christian or not, I say that there's a reason the Bible compares us to sheep. Sheep aren't very smart, and neither are we.

[Elanorea]

http://nonadventures.com/2011/05/21/evading-rapture/

[naruto_fan]

And the guy was Christian too, wasnt he? Doesnt he read The Bible? I bet he's getting tons of hate from the people who did believe him.

[Elanorea]

Originally Posted by naruto_fan

And the guy was Christian too, wasnt he? Doesnt he read The Bible? I bet he's getting tons of hate from the people who did believe him.

Maybe he was just trolling XD

[spirit_queen]

DUDE, he'd be the biggest roller ever if that's the case.

[naruto_fan]

Awww.... And I thought the trolls on yt were the best. T.T
But I spent my end of thr world day by watching POTC 4. I is epic. But I cant wait to see all the hate he'll get.

[Miranda_]

Awww, and I was looking forward to all the looting. XD

[noirmali]

My friend went up to a Christian yesterday and asked him for his car after the man was raptured. : {