Sorry in advanced if this is wordy.
Alright, so back in March I broke things off with my boyfriend at the time. We were together for three years.
I broke it off because I had started to hang out with this other guy and I realized what I could be missing out on! I started to sort of see that maybe the guy that I was with wasn't really a good match for me.
Anyway, after I broke up with him I started hanging out with this guy more and more (I'll call him John) and we eventually hooked up! It was great, fun, nothing serious. But it was so nice to have an instant connection with someone like that. He was moving 800 miles away in a month, so I new it wasn't going to ever be anything serious.
We keep in contact after he moves and find out that he'd be moving back. We continued talking. Made plans for me to go see him and whatever and one day he just says that he's not ready for a relationship and we can't be FWB anymore. I was cool with that, because I wasn't really looking for a relationship anyway.
A month or so later, I start seeing this guy and John all of a sudden starts talking to me again, trying to hook back up. After a month I break up with old whats his face and John invites me to spend the weekend with him. So I go and we have a great time as usual. Instant connection. No uncomfortable silence.
I just got back from a week of hanging out with him again and things sort of seemed different this time.
He was calling me sweetie.
Holding my hand in public.
He tells me he didn't just invite me over to have sex with. We went out and bought Legos and put them together. Super super coupley things like that. He actually turned my sexual advances down and said "I just wanna cuddle!"
I'm just getting these mixed signals.
He's super busy. He works full time at Starbucks and goes to school full time too, so he doesn't have a lot of free time. He came home late one night and said "See, this is why I don't need a girlfriend. I'm so busy and she'd be mad all the time...but you don't seem to be."
What. Does. This. Mean?!
And I honestly don't know what to do. He's a really important to me. I love him, but I sort of don't want to lose him to a relationship if it were to go down that path, but I know that we can't be friends with benefits forever. I don't know...
Speaking honestly, I'd say that all he wants is someone to act like a girlf in a way; ie to sleep with, for a bit of company but he doesn't want to commit to a relationship. If that's what you want, then fine but otherwise I'd say to break it off and free yourself to find someone new.
Yeah, I'd think that too, but all of the other times we've hung out he never done any of those things.
He has never called me sweetie. Always "kiddo".
We've hung out three times before this week and it just suddenly change. I dunno. Maybe you're right.
The best thing to do is just talk to him, I suppose.
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