What should I do about him?

[cheetahja94]

Ok, there is this guy I've had problems with before, with whether he liked me, whatever. We recently went on a band trip and a few things happened. Its kinda long so I'm gonna just repost what I put on another site (that people I know go on, so its kinda confusing so they don't know who im talking about. Just tell me if you are confused about anything)

Ok, I'm thinking he likes me. Here's why.
We went on this thing for school the other day. It was a blast, and it was kinda cuz of him. I was his "buddy" for the trip. When we got off for something after a three hour bus ride, he put his arm around my shoulders a couple times and stuff. Then, we got back on the bus, and got off at a pool. He asked me if I was gonna hang out with him and I promised to. So when I did, we found this pool toy thing and we were playing with it and I kept stealing it from him. He would come from behind and poke me in the stomach until I gave it back. And then, we were hanging out with my friend, and idk what made him want to do this but he wanted to swim in circles around her. So he grabbed my wrist. A few seconds later his hand was around mine, and then he put his fingers through my fingers like people do when they are going out. Then, we eat dinner outside of the pool with the group, and he goes to give me a high five and tries to put his fingers through mine again, but a teacher looked at him and then he stopped. When we got to the hotel, we were hanging out in a room and playing Uno, and he was sitting in such a way that his knee was touching mine. The next day, we were talking in the morning before a parade and he put his hand around my shoulders and was rubbing my shoulders too. When we got to a stadium to watch a competition (the reason we were there) he sat next to me with his leg against mine. He offered his coat a couple times because I was cold, and then he tried to get me to hold his hand again because "his hand was cold" but for whatever reason, his other one wasn't... Then, after we left the stadium our director was talking to us and he had his hand around my waist. Then, we got back on the bus. We were sitting across the aisle from each other and I had my hand over the hand rest, playing with my chapstick. He kept touching my fingers and stole my chapstick a couple times. We listened to my iPod and he listened to songs I hated just to bug me. Again, he was sitting so his knee was touching mine. Also, on the way up there, he asked me if I was going to homecoming, and why I wasn't when I told him. Also, he asked me if I had ever had a boyfriend (and made fun of me when I told him who) and tried to get me to tell him who I liked. He had told me earlier that he liked my friend, which kinda bugged me cuz it never seems to be me...but then when he asked me who I liked he said, "I like someone else too" and wouldn't tell me. Oh, and whenever we got off the bus he stood right behind me (a little too close sometimes...) with his hands on my shoulders or my waist.

So I guess he probably likes me, so what should I do about it? I don't think he would go out with me, but idk. So what should I do? And does he like me? ...thanks

[Silver_Wolf_Kitty]

He definately likes you a lot and it looks like he's trying to push your boundaries in order to discover how you feel. Your reactions say a lot to him, so now is really the time to stop being subtle since guys never in a million years will understand hints. What you should do is just ask him out on a date to the movies and dinner(not some high class restaurant, just something cheap where you guys can talk and see if its a real connection) or something like that.

[cheetahja94]

Yeah, he's asked me to a dance before and homecoming is this saturday (I'm not going but I might to see if he asks to dance or something...) but there is a problem. I am really good friends with him, but not really any of my other friends are. He flirts with leanne some, my friend that he likes, but idk if he acts like he does to leanne and I with his other girlfriends. I'm not friends with any of them, so its kinda hard to tell if this is how he always is or if he isn't as much as a flirt as he was in middle school.

I don't think I should ask him out though until I know for a fact if he likes me. If the other girl he likes isn't me, then, well, it would be stupid to ask him out on a date. And he told me that he liked leanne but he wouldn't go out with her, so idk if I would be that kind of crush or someone that he would go out with...

[Silver_Wolf_Kitty]

He's being really obvious about it. I don't know how you could doubt the fact that its you. I shall connect it to a personal experience so maybe you understand.

Before I started dating my boyfriend, he was always extremely flirtacious with me. Hugging constantly, putting his arm around my shoulders(sometimes my waist), holding my hand in the coupley way, etc etc. I always thought there was another girl he liked, so I didn't think much of it even though I was crushing on him hard. It took us going out together as friends for it to finally be pushed to a new level(he actually held my hand throughout the movie and we flirted like we would die if we stopped). Maybe instead of a date, just go out, the two of you, as friends. There won't be the pressure of a date, however there is still the option of things elevating during it.

Also, he could be trying to make you jealous by bringing up your friends or he's trying to make himself seem like less of a "loser" for liking a girl who isn't clearly showing her feelings back. Either way, he is trying to figure out if you like him, so at least be courteous enough to push aside your insecurity for a moment and stop hiding the way you feel. If he says no, continue being friends, but I'm certain he's going to say yes.

[cheetahja94]

Well we had a powder puff game today and we got out of school early to watch it, and he wanted to sit by me the entire time. He wasn't as bad as on the trip, it kinda seems like its worst during band things. But he kept touching my leg and there is a rip in the knee of the jeans I wore and he kept playing with that. But idk, I do have doubts that he could like me, but I guess that he might, he's asked me to a dance before (ok, asked is not appropriate. BEGGED is better...) but then he stopped talking to me for awhile and now its been like this. But what should I do to try to bring up who he likes again without making it obvious? Should I talk to my friend about my crush (without saying who it is) when he is in earshot, or what? And why do you think he asked if I was going to homecoming, who I liked, and if I had ever gone out with someone? I still don't understand that.

[Silver_Wolf_Kitty]

If you want to be unobvious, you can always make a guessing game of it. I always did that with my guy friends when I was curious and you could always tell when you got the answer right. Talking to your friend when he is closeby could prompt him to make a move, but its not a guarantee.

He asked if you were going to homecoming because he was either interested in seeing if you were available(ie, he might've asked you to go with him) or if he would have the opportunity to make a move then. Dances are an easy place to try that out, so that might've been his thoughts. He asks who you like because he wants to know if he has a chance(either if it is him or, on occasion, if he can outdo the other guy) and he wants to know your dating history because he wants to know if he can make a move. He's trying to scope out if you are interested in dating anyone, what dating you is like, etc etc.

[cheetahja94]

Well I know that he wouldn't have asked me to homecoming because he has a date. I know for a fact that he doesn't like her, but the football coach made it necessary to have a date, and that was before we really started talking again. And the guy I told him I had gone out with is this guy he hates (I think its cuz the girl he used to like was obsessed with him...) but yeah...we have band practice tonight and we're getting pizza half an hour before then so maybe I'll try to bring it up. It came back up at lunch but not for more than a couple seconds, cuz he was trying to prove a point that I don't tell him anything.

I don't think he would openly admit to liking me though to my face, so would it be stupid of me to get a friend (not leanne of course) to ask him if he likes me? Its kinda confusing cuz he likes one of my friends and my other friend likes him, and so I can't use them to figure anything out, and none of my other friends really know him. But I'll try to get it out of him tonight, even though I'm kinda scared to because I know it probably won't be me. Or at least as far as he says.

Oh, also, I kinda want to go to homecoming, and there is this guy that I'm really good friends with. I was texting him earlier and he told me my friend was going out with this one guy, so I asked if he was asking anyone to homecoming. He said he wasn't and asked if I was, and I said no, and he replied with "well idk if its worth it to go without a date" so I was wondering how I could ask him as a friend without making it awkward. Like, it wouldn't be as a couple, but maybe with my friend kendra and her friend tom. I've been getting ideas that this guy likes me, cuz of stuff he says sometimes, but idk. So what do you guys think I should do to ask him to homecoming as a friend (and as a group I guess)...