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Silent_Wolf (Offline)
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Default 02-11-2012, 09:17 AM

So school sucks, work sucks, life in general sucks and being sick sucks. But I think the worst part is that on Monday, one of my best friends died. I no longer have the world's most adorable beagle to go home to anymore because my parents are cheap and refused to ever take him to the vet. I'm sorry, d*ckwads, but you don't treat a dog like a car and think "I'll just take him when we get the money." NO. You treat that dog like another child and freaking take him to the vet before it gets worse! A year ago, Cooper had PARVO; we have no idea how he survived without going to the vet. But he perked right up after and was the happiest dog ever; he even didn't gain that much weight back after, either, because he was constantly up and about after that.

But he caught it again, and it wasn't even 24 hours later that he was gone. I'm angry at my parents for acting like this isn't their fault; that dog hasn't been to a vet since the second year we've had him. And I was the one being irresponsible, according to them: It was simply unfeasible to take Cooper to the vet given the current gas money problem and the fact his vet charges 100 dollars a visit.


Because of this, I no longer have the one thing that got me through high school and my early college months. I can't go home anymore and smile the minute I walk through that f**king door because he's sitting there waiting for me. I can't see his tail wagging or his crooked smile when we scratched the one spot on his back, I'll never hear his superquiet "please give me a treaaat!" bark again or his OH MY GOD THE MAILWOMAN'S HERE bark that would drive us all nuts. I'll never see him go absolutely nuts over getting peanut butter again.

I've just lost my best friend. and I can't stand the thought of going home anymore. My parents are fighting as it is and I don't know if this is going to make it worse. My dorm situation's just getting worse as time goes on and I can't find an apartment so I can stay in college and work. If I had it my way I'd be able to have my final two classes on the one day that way I didn't have to worry about it, so that if I absolutely can't stay here, I can still go to classes. I'd just find work in my hometown; it's only 30 minutes away on a good day anyway.

I just..

Everything was going so great. Even work's gone to hell. I can't go into work without hearing my boss bashing men as a whole because her own boyfriend's a complete idiot. My newest coworker is a complete nimrod who can't even alphabetize books and will sit there staring at you for uncomfortable periods of time. She can't even grasp the concept of NEATEN UP THE SHELVES SO THE BOOKS ARE NOT FALLING OVER. We have demonstrated how to do these things, SHOWN HER HOW TO DO EVERYTHING, and she still asks over and over and OVER how to organize books by author last name!!!

To make a comparison here, when I started working back in November, I was sick as hell and worked maybe one night a week at first due to classes. My boss made me take the second-busiest night of the year for us - Light-up Night - off so I could see a doctor. But even though I was still sick a good week afterward, maybe even longer than that, I worked hard and only sat down to figure out how to reorganize other areas of the store.

This brings me to our vice president. All I will say is that he's as mercurial as a mad hatter and I really, really wish I didn't have to tiptoe around to get my internship. He wrote a clause into the employment agreement that we cannot have another job while we are working for this company; he will find out and he will have you basically put on a spit. Also, fired. I forgot to mention that. If he's ever in a good mood, thank your lucky stars and gods because he WILL come back the next day angry as hell.

... I guess that sums up everything. I feel tired now.

I stare at the girl in the mirror: T-shirt, torn up jeans, no beauty queen.
But the way that you see me, you get underneath me, and all my defenses just fall away, fall away.
I am beautiful with you, even in the darkest part of me. I am beautiful with you;
Make it feel the way it's supposed to be!

You're here with me: Just show me this and I'll believe I am beautiful with you!
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