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Silver_Wolf_Kitty (Offline)
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Default 02-08-2010, 07:47 PM

Definately set the boundaries. I regret not doing that and it had awful results, with me constantly feeling the pressure to do what they wanted. If you feel like you are doing something you don't or like you are doing it to make him happy, stop right there and don't go any further. He needs to respect your boundaries and any guy who doesn't deserves the boot.

I also will say beware the guy who is unwilling to accept your friends and family or seems to drive them off. While it isn't their relationship, no decent friendship should ever come into question because of him. If he pulls any "me or thems" or suggests your friends meddle too much, take a good look at why he is so nervous about having them around because it suggests there is something wrong with him. There is a big difference between concern over an unhealthy relationship and demanding someone gives people up. My ex did this to me and before I realized it, I had lost all of my friends. In fact, I'm still suffering from what he did in driving them off and "speaking for me" and don't think I'll ever be able to repair the majority of my friendships.

This ties into another point, don't ever be so engulfed in a relationship that you forget your friends. Designate time for him and time for you. Don't blow off your friends or spend every moment free with him. You will want the space and the chance to be with your friends. Trust me, the time spent with them won't be much once you leave high school and you will want to treasure those memories. While you'll make friends in college, its not exactly the same, so don't miss out on them when you have the chance. Boys come and go, your friends are going to be there for a long time if your relationships are strong.

This may seem like a lot, but if you continue to just be yourself and stick with your life, these will all come second nature. Relationships are supposed to be fun, so enjoy this innocence now. When you get older, most guys aren't as interested in that silly first moment that you held hands or laughing over your awkward first kisses. They tend to treat most girls as a game(or, their pants as one) until they find the right one, so its this rare time you should treasure where the priority isn't sex--its just liking one another.

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