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Silver_Wolf_Kitty (Offline)
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Default Domestic Violence - 08-01-2009, 11:12 AM

No One Believed Me - 1 - The Bigger Picture - Your Life - MSN Lifestyle

Today when I was online, I found this story that I think everyone should make a point to read. If you don't have the time, I'll highlight a few few points.

Quote:
Then she started cutting up vegetables for dinner. She had a serrated vegetable knife with a blade about seven inches long. She turned around and she stabbed at me.

"I tried to block it, but I was surprised. I was off balance...the knife went right through my collar and gave me a little nick on my neck.

"She reared back to stab me again. I tried to block it again...I hit her in the mouth. She dropped the knife, ran to the telephone, called 911, and told them, 'My husband is hitting me! I think he's gonna kill me.'
Quote:
David says there's a double standard when it comes to charging men. "Now, isn't that strange? When she had a fat lip, it was a felony and I was going to jail. But when they finally realized that she tried to stab me in the neck, it stopped being a crime, and instead it was a mental health issue."
Quote:
Woods, a former construction worker, suffered disabling work-related injuries early in his marriage. He says:
"The violence really began in our family about 10 days after Ruth realized that she had all the power [financially]. I knew I had to get my kids out. I called the largest domestic violence shelter agency in Sacramento County several times. They told me, 'Men are perpetrators of domestic violence; women are victims of domestic violence,' and hung up.
I'm wondering what everyone thinks about this clear double standard in how we treat domestic violence. Men aren't acknowledged as victims, only women are, and its led to incredibly dangerous situations. There was a study included that says about half of the time women are abusers and 70% of the time, women are the first to strike. Also, their attacks tend to involve weapons more often and are surprise attacks. How come with this information, we still find it hard to believe that women can be as violent, if not more so, than men? How come there aren't more services provided to men? How come all abuse lines only acknowledge women as victims?

For those of you who don't know, I lived with an abuser up until two years ago. The abuser was my step-mother, who attempted to smother my father, stab him, and eventually attacked me for defending him while she was sending him into having a heart attack. In the 12+ years of abuse I dealt with, she had a habit of attacking my father, then when he defended himself, she called the police and claimed he was beating her. When the police arrived, it didn't matter what you said, he was dragged away. When they finally realized she was the perpetrator(and, coincidentally, she was mentally ill), they never once arrested her. They actually frequently left her in the house with us even though she was out of control. Never once in this time did we receive assistance until finally I filed a report against her. They didn't believe my father, they thought he was automatically an abuser because he's a man. How could the law be so lacking in its practices that with abuse it now arrests first and asks questions later?


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