05-26-2009, 07:35 AM
It also smacks too much of Twilight, which is not something that anyone who wishes to create a well rounded character should be copying. Your character's name translates as "Beautiful Star", which is a Sue name. Just give her an ordinary surname like say, Brown or Hayland, or a less spectacular first name, like Kelly or Jane. It's just the combination of both the names together that's sounding Sueish. Otherwise, everything's cool.