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  Modern Day Manners (Doll Article)

(June 21, 2007 by support Send DollMail )
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When your mom was young, young ladies were expected to act a certain way. When your grandmother was young, the rules were even harder to follow. Today, things are a bit looser, but manners have not gone away completely. In fact, with new technology, there may even be more to learn to make sure you are being classy at all times.

The Basics

I hope we all know the basics of good manners. When we ask for something, we say, "Please" to everyone. When we receive something, even if it's not our first choice, we say, "Thank you." If someone says thank you to you, you say, "You're welcome." Grunting, "Huh?" and "Hey you" are not polite. Instead, I'm sure you're already saying, "Yes" and "Excuse me" when you are called upon or need to get someone else's attention.

If you're already doing these things, or at least know you should be, you're about fifty percent there. Real manners take a lot more than a simple please and thank you, however even in the twenty-first century.

Mean It

It doesn't matter how much money you have or how you dress. Everyone can and should be polite to others. It makes the world a nicer place, and it actually feels good too like giving yourself a nice pat on the back for a job well done. I said please and thank you aren't enough and here's why.

Teenagers are notorious for saying please with a sneer and thank you with an eye roll. If you roll your eyes and have a rude tone while mouthing polite words you are still rude. To be truly classy and polite, you have to go a step farther. You actually have to mean it or come as close as possible.

You don't have to sign your soul away to say thank you to the lunch lady at the cafeteria and nobody will make fun of you for inserting a pleasant "please" into, "Give me your roll if you're not going to eat it." Manners are a sign of respect, and we all like to be respected.

Class is in the Details

If you've accomplished the basics with meaning, you're ready for the serious stuff. A boy might try to open a door for you. Let him. It doesn't mean you're weak, it means he's got the kind of manners his father was raised with. And of course, say, "Thank you."

If you see someone struggling to open a door for any reason young kids, elderly, arms full of boxes, open it for them. If they don't say thank you, don't sweat it. Just think of how much more polite you are. You might even offer to help carry some of those boxes if you're heading in the same direction.

If a friend is telling a story, don't interrupt. It can be excruciating, but talking over someone else is rude.

Wait for her to finish and then share your thought. Speaking of interrupting, taking a phone call or responding to a text message is the same as blowing them off. At the very least, check to see who it is and say, "I'm sorry, I have to take this..." if it's someone like your parents. If it's just another friend, call them back in a little while. Finish with one friend before you start with another or you'll end up with no friends at all.

Entire books have been written about the finer points of manners such as crossing legs at the ankles and which fork to use when. If you don't feel confident that you are using the best manners, you can certainly find a book on the subject or just watch people around you. If someone is nice to you, it feels good. Return the favor by being nice to someone else. You will know you've done your share to make the world a nicer place to be.

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San Marcos, CA
Posted On: June 23, 2007
I think it's funny how people say they are polite then go into saying how the SOMETIMES say please, thank you, and your welcome. lol

Anyway, I thought this was good because I know so many people that have no manners at all. Like, my friend will come to me durring lunch with some sap story about how she doesn't have very much money for a pizza and only chips at lunch, and stares at me until I hand her the money.

Then she walks away without saying thank you. >_
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Spring, TX
Posted On: June 22, 2007
i say plz and ty but thatz about it. and i only say plz 2 adults. i only say thanks to my friends i dont say thank yew.
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Jacksonville, FL
Posted On: June 22, 2007
im polite when i feel like it. u see, sumtimes when ppl r talkin to me i dont listen and zone off, or when im getting a lecture 4rm my parents i just turn my head the other way and think about sumthin else. i kno i do it, i can help it, but i dont want to. alot of ppl think im sooo polite, but they dont kno the real chante......
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Oregon, WI
Posted On: June 22, 2007
I completely agree with the second to the last paragraph.

The society today is based waaay too much around electronics. It's as if people suddenly had cell phones sprouting from their hands!

It's very, very rude to be talking to someone, and then the moment your phone rings be diving to answer it.

If it's a very important phone call, that's one thing. But to be having a personal discussion in public... it's rude and annoying for the other party.

So I'll ask, Please don't do this! The world will thank you for it!
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Pembroke Pines, FL
Posted On: June 22, 2007
Very cool. Good manners are something everyone should know. I've also read some fancy etiquitte books out of curiousity, and some of those rules are just nuts. Use this fork and that spoon and this for bread and the cup is always on your left..

Or is it your right?

Give me a burger anyday, although I would like to dine out at a super fancy place just once, for the experience.
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Baltimore, MD
Posted On: June 22, 2007
You're right that mannrs have chnged. If it was still the 1900's I'd have to wer a...dress
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Posted On: June 22, 2007
Thanks for the article! In opinion of my family and my teachers Im a very polite girl.But anyways..Good article!
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Lebanon, MO
Posted On: June 21, 2007
The whole opening the door for someone else was talk about in ethics class. I found it silly that people making it a moral issue, if someone opens the door for you, it means they took the time to think about you. I don't think the first anyone's mind is 'let me open that door for you, you look extremely fragile. Anyhow it seems manners are more common in a college campus then in high school. I remeber one time I was carry like four icecream cones, and somebody was in my way. Not only did I have to ask them to move, they didn't even offer to help. It shocked me, because I was taught to help if someone looks overloaded with something.
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Sappington, MO
Posted On: June 21, 2007
thanx alot! like the 1st person said most people who need this article wont read it but it was a good one!
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United Kingdom
Posted On: June 21, 2007
Good tips. I'm guessing I'm pretty polite, because people tell me I am. This is a very resourceful article.

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Posted On: June 21, 2007
I do all of these things... So I must be a pretty polite person..

Wow. I'm surprised!!
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Posted On: June 21, 2007
Thanks for the awesome tips!!!
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United Kingdom
Posted On: June 21, 2007
PLEASE carry on writing awesome articles!

Great Tips.
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Bon Air, VA
Posted On: June 21, 2007
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