Time Out! @ Girl-Doll Fashion Gossip

XML

If you’re anything like me, you’ll remember time-outs with a twist of fondness. After all, you likely deserved the punishment for something you’d done. But as you got older, the time outs got less frequent and you (hopefully) learned to behave a bit better. However, the need for a time out hasn’t diminished – it’s just applied in a new way.

The Time Out

A time out is a time of reflection. It’s a time to think about what’s going on, identify what got out of control and to get your emotions back in check. The time out also gives you time to cool down so that you can deal with a situation more effectively. When you were five getting a time-out, you might have taken a cookie without permission and found yourself in the “thinking chair” or the “naughty step.” There are so many different names for the time out. Even as you got a bit older, you might have been sent to your room without dinner for getting a bit rude at the table, or even grounded for a time thanks to some outlandish behavior. Time-outs are still around for behavior things, but it is another kind of time-out that can be much more valuable.

Taking a Time Out

When you get in trouble and are given a time out, you spend most of your time reflecting on how unfair it is and how the punishment isn’t just. But when you give yourself a time out, you’re stopping what often becomes a run-away train before it jumps the tracks. Taking a time out is a great skill now and in the future, especially when you’re in a serious long-term relationship.

When you get angry, things can come of your mouth that sound good in the moment, but you regret later. Keeping your emotional response to a situation under control is critical if you want to avoid getting in trouble at home and at school. Often kids our age feel powerless in many situations and wind up saying things they don’t mean or even acting out physically. Even if you don’t feel in particular control of the situation, you do have a measure of control.

Creating the Time Out System

Take control by letting the adults in your life know that you’ll need a time-out from time to time. Most likely, if they are already aware of your emotions, they will agree that this is a particularly mature decision and help you get this system set up. To take time-outs, you’ll need a location to go both at home and at school. Time-outs don’t work as well on the job. At school you might go sit in the front office or the office or room of your favorite teacher or counselor – a place where you feel safe and at peace. At home, your bedroom is a great choice, although others prefer to take a walk or sit on the porch for a minute in the fresh air.

Finally, you’ll need an agreement from your teachers and parents that when you request a time-out, they grant you one and you go to your designated spot for ten minutes. This actually will give them a chance to cool down as well. Granted, if you seem to need a time-out every day, you might be abusing the system, but taking a time-out when you need it will give you a great way to better control your behavior.