Being a good girlfriend is more than just smiling at his lame jokes and thinking heís adorable. Every boy, every girl and every relationship is different. That means every recipe for success in love will be a bit different, but there are some ingredients that are close to universal for almost everyone.
Good Girlfriend Material
First and foremost, to be a good girlfriend, you must be ďgood girlfriend material.Ē This means you have what it takes to actually be a girlfriend. Let me elaborate. If you date four boys at the same time without telling any of them that he isnít the only on in your life, youíre on shaky ground.
Sure, you can date around, but once you commit to being someoneís girlfriend, youíre committed (unless youíve actually discussed still seeing other people.) Dating, kissing, or fooling around with someone else while claiming to be a girlfriend means you have a bit of growing up to do before youíre good girlfriend material. If you think about it, youíll agree that nobody would really want to be your boyfriend if youíre lying to him or not staying honest and faithful when he expects you to.
A great term, candor. It means you arenít afraid to say what you think and feel, and thatís exactly what you need to be a good girlfriend. Boys have trouble reading minds and expressions; itís just not the way they were programmed. This means you have to tell them what youíre thinking and be straightforward about it if you want to have solid communication in the relationship.
When he asks you if you mind him hanging out the guys
tonight, just be honest. Tell him yes you do or no you donít, but skip the mind games. He doesnít want to play. If you do mind, tell him so. And if you mind, but realize you need to let him have some space of his own, you can tell him that, too. Perhaps offer a compromise Ė ďCome eat an early dinner with me and then go out with the guys tonight. That way I can see you, too.Ē
Itís hard to be around people who are uptight all the time. If youíre freaking out about every little thing he says or doesnít say and reading hidden messages into his raised eyebrow or the weird smile he supposedly gave you after lunch, you just need to relax. Loosen up! You donít need to worry about hidden messages anyway, most guys arenít that deep Ė they play things close to the surface.
If you stay loose and flexible with the relationship, youíll never be too clingy or whiney and youíll not get your feelings hurt when something comes up that forces a change in plans. Besides, staying stress-free usually means youíll get what you want anyway. Thereís a great line from a country song by Montgomery Gentry that sums it up best, ďI keep on looking for the next great thing to do because she donít tell me, too.Ē