If you’ve had a bad relationship with a guy
or with someone you thought was your friend, you are able to look back and tell that there were certainly signs of trouble long before things fell apart completely. Often, you can apply those same warning signs to future relationships to avoid falling into the trap that so many girls seem to find themselves. Making the same mistakes over and over again is more than frustrating – it can even be dangerous.
When a boy is violent, or a girl for that matter, he is often unable to control his behavior and emotions simultaneously. It would be highly unlikely that he would show his violent tendencies toward you, especially in the beginning of a relationship and the flirting stages where everyone is on their best behavior. But even if he’s sweet and gentle with you, watch how he interacts with other people and animals.
Does he frequently get into fights when he gets angry? Is he unable to talk about emotions and instead must act them out? Does he punish his animals with some form of violence – kicking, hitting, insults, or other harmful activities? Not only will it be extremely uncomfortable to be around someone who acts that way toward animals and other people, it will be far worse when he reaches a point of being angry with you and treats you the same way.
Never think that you’ll be safe and that his violence toward others is something you can change. He has to want to change, and if he wants you badly enough, you can talk about it and give him plenty of time to show that he’s really capable of change before you spend too much time with him, especially one-on-one.
He’s a Cheater
Sad truth, but once a cheater, always a cheater in the vast majority of cases. Of course, you should also be sure you’re clear on what makes a cheater. If the two of you agree you’re in a serious relationship, he shouldn’t be making out with someone else or hopping into bed with her. But things get a big fuzzy when it comes to hugging, kissing on the cheek and flirting. Are those things cheating? The two of you would need to discuss it.
If you like a guy, but he’s a known flirt, he’ll likely stay that way. If you’re okay with it, the relationship will probably be a lot of fun since the two of you can be so open and honest. However, if he was cheating on his last girlfriend with his current girlfriend and now has his eyes on you, you can feel confident that you’d just be one in line for this boy and he’s not worth your time.
If you’re starting to hang out with a new friend and realize that she’s constantly lying, fabricating stories and doing a very liberal exaggeration of events frequently, you should approach the new friendship with caution. Many people get into the habit of lying or bending the truth, and it’s a hard habit to break. Getting used to her lying to others would be far easier than realizing she’s likely lying to you just as much as she is to the rest of them.